Inertia and Insomnia

Awake for about 36 hours straight now, with the exception of a few hours nap yesterday afternoon. And due to important family events, I won’t be getting to sleep until well after midnight tonight. So it will be about 50 hours give or take. Thank God I have been able to get my meds even without health insurance, because I would be incapable of functioning through my dysfunction (insomnia being a symptom, as well as hypersomnia) as well as I do. Which, depending on the day, isn’t well.

Most people in my regular life are surprised and confused when they hear that I have insomnia and hypersomnia. Few realize the two symptoms or conditions can coexist, and even those with that uncommon knowledge usually don’t understand the practicalities of living with both.

What I have found works best to explain how the two coexist is Newton’s First Law, the Law of Inertia. An object at rest will stay at rest, unless acted upon by an outside force, and an object in motion will stay in motion unless acted upon by an outside force. That’s how my sleep works.

It’s like I can stay up almost indefinitely, but once I do finally give into sleep, it’s nigh impossible to wake me up or for me to wake myself. Alarm clocks, family members, trying to adjust my sleep schedule… they do nothing. There are times when attempting to get sleep that I will take between 4 and 6 mgs of Xanax and not even feel tired.

So my sleep schedule is almost fluid in it’s rigidity. Every once in a while I can maintain a normal sleep schedule for 1 to 4 days. Sometimes I will have a normal schedule in terms of sleep duration and wake duration, but it will be flipped to where bedtime is solidly after 6 or 7 am and I cannot wake until at least 2 pm. Once I had 10 days straight of sleeping every other 24 hour block rather than every 24 hour block.

I love being awake, and I love being asleep. What my body seems to resist with all it’s might is the change between those two states. Hence, Inertia and Insomnia. Thanks for reading. If you’ve ever experienced this phenomenon, please leave me a comment. It’s good to know I’m not alone. Thanks again.

An Anonymous Outsider

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